As we mature, it’s easy to lose close relationships due to frequent moves, job relocations, and social networks changing such as your children’s schools. When we are living our lives, we can be so distracted by competing demands for our attention. I realized that in my early 40’s, I was missing the friendships that came so easily when I was younger.

Make the time for your social life. Consider it’s a non-negotiable for your mental and emotional health, and longevity. I’m a highly introverted person, but I’ve learned the value and joy of connections that have brought me career opportunities, interesting invites, and invaluable support through challenging times. Without wonderful friends in my life, I wouldn’t feel this supported, understood, and have less joy in my life.

While being a caregiver for my father, I realized that I had to learn to be a good friend to myself. I was battling something deep inside of me that I couldn’t even communicate to other people. I felt that many people around me couldn’t really understand what I was going through. Watching my father lose his health was one of the hardest things to witness.

I took time to reflect and step back from my daily life. I needed to hibernate. If you are going through a challenging time or facing a landmark birthday, helping yourself first will allow you to have clarity and eventually be a better friend to others. Learning how to take care of and prioritize myself, and explain my needs to others was part of my growth and maturation process. I had to learn what I could tolerate and what was important to me. Even if others don’t understand you, you can give yourself the gift of self-compassion and self-knowledge.