It’s easy to live in an anonymous city without bothering to interact with people. This can become a bad habit for several reasons. The small moments of connection are important. We build walls around us because we are busy and lost in our thoughts. It’s more efficient to be in task mode.
Micro-connections are small moments of social connection that have greater impact then we may realize in the moment. I’ll never forget the helpful sales person at Macy’s who spoke to me at length about finding the right undergarment for my mother who couldn’t shop on her own. There was a long line of people, which I never even noticed because she didn’t take her eyes off of me. She made me feel understood. Her generosity reminds me that we can help others with our presence and compassion.
Ease and Grace
These casual interactions give us a chance to connect to people without baggage. Seeing the barista at our regular coffee shop, greeting the bodega owner, becoming a regular at a favorite restaurant are all ways to bring a sense of community and continuity into our lives. When we have moved into a new city, facing a transition in our lives, or when our mood is low, these connections can slowly nurture us back to life. It truly makes a difference.
When going through a challenge, it’s nice to have to have social interactions that don’t expect much of you. You are exchanging pleasantries and don’t have to go into a deep conversation. There’s comfort in the routine and the friendly faces.
I think the pandemic taught us that even small social connections are a lifeline. I remember buying bubble milk tea on a regular basis because it gave me a chance to get out of the house and take a walk. I looked forward to going out into the world when I spent most of my time indoors. Sometimes this was the only real life social interaction I had while in lockdown.
Talk to Everyone
Talking to people while waiting in line or while sitting in a park is a great way to learn about new job opportunities, make a friend, or learn about things happening in the neighborhood. I’ve heard people share these are the types of events that can change your life in an instant. You never know who may change your life and vice versa. It starts out with being open. Stop staring at your phone for a moment and look up.
Serendipity
While facing a challenging situation without any direction, I overheard the woman ahead of me in line discussing a similar situation. I interrupted her to give her sympathy, which was warmly received. I learned of a possibility that hadn’t occurred to me before.
You may brighten someone else’s day with a few moments of your time. Just smiling at people is a small way to cheer someone up. Remember the old saying that you never know what someone is going through.
