As a caregiver, you end up not having enough time to do chores, go to a doctor’s appointment, make endless phone calls, cook and go to the grocery store. You can become more and more isolated over time, if you stop accepting invitations and stop inviting people over. Thinking about what you can do, in a modified fashion, so you can return to friends and family when you have less responsibility some day.
Phone Date
You can choose the same person or talk to different people. When you hear someone’s voice, you feel less alone. Choose people who will cheer you up and encourage you. You need people to support you through this challenging time. People hardly talk on the phone anymore, but it’s a nice habit.
Virtual Book Clubs
A good benefit about the last few years of going remote, is that people can reach the outside world as caregivers in ways that weren’t possible. You can choose thousands of exercise videos on Youtube so you can counteract all the effects of sitting. Zoom meetings give you a break from caregiving and allow you to meet people from the comfort of your home when you can’t go out.
Invite People Over
Your loved one will also appreciate having visitors. Choose the best time of day. If that’s not possible, invite people over when your person is napping. Sharing a beverage with a friend helps you feel less isolated and maintains your connection so you don’t become strangers. Some people may not be comfortable, so don’t take this personally. Find people who understand. Even if it’s for a shorter period of time because you or your loved one is exhausted, you will benefit from having something other than endless caregiving tasks to think about.
Be Friendly
When you do get the chance to leave your house, then be friendly to the barista and everyone in between. You never know who was in your shoes and can give you advice or or just encourage you to keep going. I have met so many former caregivers by sharing my story when possible. Our stories bond us together in our common humanity and people who have been affected by a loved one’s decline definitely want to help others in the same boat. Some people will distance themselves, but you are looking for your tribe so keep it moving and don’t waste a second thinking about people who react negatively. You are trying to build a new social network and rejection is part of the process.
Staying connected and trying everything possible to make this happen is absolutely worth it in the end. Your heart and mind will feel lighter. You have to humble yourself a bit, but never think you are imposing. Assume that people want to connect with others deep down inside to motivate yourself.
