My usual modus operandi is to take on tasks and just push through, but that hasn’t been working lately. I finally learned that it’s okay to use this excuse. Mainly, it has kept me from being super critical of myself. Having boundaries is a form of self-care. It keeps resentment from forming and also helps you honor yourself. Self-care is foremost, about taking care of your mental health resources you need to carry out your life and responsibilities. The past few years have taught us that our mental and physical health is entwined and equally important.

Now is the perfect time to complete a deep edit of your life and adjust. Ask yourself if your life suits the reality that you face now. For me, I wasn’t able to concentrate on reading fiction until very recently. I would leave books on my nightstand as a reminder and feel guilty everytime I saw books that I didn’t have mental space  for. I felt that if I wasn’t able to read while working from home, then I would never be able to read. As an avid reader who used reading as an escape and way to mentally decompress from the day, it was strange for me to feel restless and unable to sit still. I’m the kind of person who has loved the library since childhood. I ended up listening to audiobooks. I had held off because I thought that it was faster to read a book and thought audiobooks weren’t the real deal.  Now I find it one of the most relaxing parts of my day and am continually impressed by the quality of narration. 

If you have an uncomfortable or sticky situation, I don’t have the bandwidth is an easy way to not attack or blame someone. Decide that you don’t have the bandwidth for certain people or activities.  Minimize the time or the way you interact with them.  Once you say this the first time, you realize you don’t owe anyone an explanation. You can selectively choose who or what you allow into your life.

Going forward, complete an inventory of what’s still working in your life and brainstorm solutions. Try using this in situations which aren’t the best use of your limited energy. Learn to be gentle with yourself.